Archive for October, 2009


So today’s the big day.  The phrase “big day” seems to illicit the image that something exciting is occurring but alas, not so much.  It’s exciting in the sense that I’m demonstrating courage and escaping a situation that very easily could have held me down indefinitely, however, my main emotion today is fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of being alone, fear that somehow I’m making a huge mistake that I will later regret (though intellectually I know this is absolutely, 100 percent, false).

Simply put, change has never been easy for me.  From something as simple as changing shampoo brands to something as life altering as, within the span of 4 days, deciding to pack up my things and get the hell out.  So today will be hard, I will be sad, I will probably cry more tears than I knew I had.  My heart will ache for a while, and it is very possible that this situation has changed me in ways that can never be changed back, but I promise that I will not let it break me.  I will help others in the same situation whether it be through word or action.


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There’s something so weird about an introductory post.  I don’t even know where to begin-so I won’t.  I’ll just let all the details unravel here.  Some details may come quickly, others slowly, I just don’t know.  What I do know is that I want to write because it’s therapeutic, it’s something that  I can do to better myself.  That’ll probably be a pretty common theme here for a while, things I want to do to benefit myself, because I’ve been putting them off for much too long.

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